A year ago, I attended Tony Robbin’s Date with Destiny (DWD) event. It was a 6-day, 6-night intensive conference designed to take your life to the next level. This event was attended by over 5,000 people from all over the world, and we worked and played hard-typically about 15 hours/day.
It was hard and it was intense, and it was a long week. I have two young kids, so I’m not used to late nights, and somedays we would go until 2:00 or 3:00am! The event caught up with me and I got very sick the last few days.
In today’s world it would be called a Super Spreader event. Most people got sick as we were going full throttle for a week: working, playing, jumping, dancing, laughing, hugging, high-fiving, and back rubbing. Things we would never do today in our Covid world.
Did we contract Covid? Maybe. It was the worst cold or flu I’ve ever had, and it took me weeks to recover.
But the work that we did during that event will take years to recover.
We spread germs. A lot of them and I realize that now.
We also spread love, acceptance, joy, laughter, and gratitude for life and the journey we are all experiencing together. It has taken me a year to process this life-changing event and how it prepared me for 2020.
Here are my top three lessons from Date with Destiny and how my life will never be the same:
1. What if your biggest gift is what you tend to hide about yourself?
a. As I was able to understand the blueprint of my life, I looked at my past and I offered a lot of forgiveness. I had a childhood that wasn’t easy, and I have been ashamed of that. At DWD, I was able to see that strength is one of my gifts. This is not a gift that is given; it is earned. And because of those experiences, I am blessed with strength, resilience, and acceptance. Three traits that I am proud of and will not hide from anymore. And boy did I need those this year!
b. In the past, I have been trying to be less “intense” and strong to make other people more comfortable. This year I decided to own my strength and use it to empower others. You can be strong, loving and accepting all at the same time.
c. One of the most impactful lessons I learned about forgiveness was to realize that the person who hurt me was doing the best that they could for where they were in their life at that time. If we have the courage to forgive others, we are given the gift of empathy. When you forgive, you can truly love yourself & others without restriction.
2. You can change your mood and mindset NOW!
a. Sometimes I can feel like I have the world on my shoulders: owning my own business, being a mom to two young kids, their schedules, nutrition, school schedules, being a wife, a friend, a daughter… It can be exhausting & overwhelming. I decided that when I feel tired or burn out, to change that state immediately and focus on Joy, Love and Gratitude in that moment.
b. Music is a great way to change your state. When you attend a Tony Robbins event, you will hear loud music, you see people dancing, and jumping around. He teaches you to use your physical body to change your mental state. Try it! If you are tired, play some upbeat music, dance, jump and you will feel better immediately. (Here’s my parent hack: when my kids are getting on my last nerve, I play the song, “We are Family” and everyone’s mood changes immediately and we all start singing and dancing. ?)
c. What story are you telling yourself? Listen to what you say to yourself every day. What is the question you ask yourself multiple times per day? Is it empowering? Is it loving? If not, Change it! You are in control of your mind and the rules you have set for yourself. My Primary question went from “How can I be strong?” to “How can I be more joy, love & more grace in this moment?” My mindset went from a fear-based mentality to a loving, faith-based mindset.
3. Goals are short-lived. Become the person you want to be, don’t focus so much on the outcome.
a. I’ve always been a very goal-oriented, task-oriented person. I like achieving big goals, checking things off of my list and taking myself and my work to the next level. However, what happens when you achieve that goal? If you’re like me, it feels great…until it doesn’t and now you have another goal to achieve. Sometimes that is exhilarating, and sometimes it is exhausting. So, this year, my focus was less on the goal and more on the person I wanted to become.
b. I blew past my goals this year! It is less stressful and more fun to focus on what you want to achieve, learn and become than an arbitrary goal. And it’s never-ending-in a good way! This is a much more attainable way to stay motivated and excited about your work. Focus on learning, becoming the person you want to be and how to create the MOST value to your customers-that is true success.
Date with Destiny was training me for 2020. I know that now. When this year started falling apart, I knew how to stay happy, motivated, and grateful for every moment. I embraced my strength and was able to use it to help others stay strong and grateful.
Maybe I contracted Covid at this event last year, but I also contracted love, joy, gratitude, strength, friendship and a love for myself and my family that gets stronger each and every day.
Thank you, Tony Robbins!
